So Long, Summer: A homebody's personal life update

With the official start of the most magical time of the year—the—Ber months (September, October, November, and December), I wanted to share a personal update on the past few months as we sign off from summer. I did this after our holiday break and it was so therapeutic for me—so allow me to put aside all of the projects for a minute and just catch you up on life around here lately.

It's funny how I used to wait all year for summer. When I was growing up, it meant no school and long days playing outside. And then while we lived in Idaho, summer finally meant the snow would stop (for the most part--oy!) and although it was short-lived, it was magical. I think my feelings toward summer are changing as I grow. There are perks: longer days and the girls are home from school, so our mornings aren't quite as rushed. We had some wonderful time with family and friends (more on that in a minute)— But the weather in North Carolina is so ideal nearly all year, that it almost feels the least ideal in the summer. Or maybe the promises of slow summers I once knew are no longer, that it stings a little more—this was anything but a slow summer.

Even so, sometimes the hustle and bustle is fun. When we had a bunch of family over and I decided on Friday to host a big Father's day bash on Sunday. I rented tables and chairs and dug out all my decor. It was a whirlwind and chaotic and I guess I kind of live for that chaos, especially when it has anything to do with hosting family. It was truly a highlight for me.

We also hosted aunts and uncles from all over the world and family and friends visited this summer, too. We got really good at keeping the s'mores basket stocked. Chris can whip up his salt and vinegar chicken and a tomato salad in under an hour and I kept our favorite card games tucked in the cabinet in the dining room in case adults wanted to play a hand or two while the kids swam after dinner. While we definitely realized the guest house could be laid out infinitely better (and I made a few mental notes for hopefully next year.), it took me all summer to conclude that those nights at home would always fulfill me more than traveling just about anywhere. I shouldn't be shocked--I've always said I was a homebody! But like, shoot. I'm really a homebody. I'm fueled by being home. But I also know I grow by experiencing all the things that take me out of the house.

We can't always share when we're away for various reasons, but I missed home a lot this summer. All for really good, exciting, dreamy—even fun!—reasons. We dashed off to Oak Island with friends at the very beginning of summer. We soon realized it just might be our favorite local beach. We stayed right on the beach, which is absolutely my favorite way to do it. Me and my bestie, Meagan, would walk for miles on the sand before the sun came up. And we bookmarked the days with the prettiest sunset I have ever seen I saw on this trip. The whole wide sky was the brightest coral. It was unreal. We all screamed and cried and took endless photos and videos until it completely set.

Quickly after that trip, we flew up to York, Pennsylvania to sign off on our wallpaper line that has since been released. We toured the whole factory and met the most amazing craftsmen and I don't know if I ever breathed in so much charm in a single town. It was the first time in my life where everything I learned while studying art in college came together. I felt at home among the designers drawing out endless patterns and the print makers and the color matchers. Their office spaces were brick walls and wood beams and large canvas cloths separating desks. In another life, I would happily work in a wallpaper factory.

Days later, we flew out to San Francisco for a week to meet with the Pottery Barn Kids team. We did an Q&A with the entire design team and then a few days of photoshoots. The PBK team is filled with the friendliest, sweetest, most talented people that we have gotten so close with. Even still, the most uncomfortable part of my job is being in front of the camera. I had so much practice growing up with four sisters where we would take photos constantly! But I still get stage freight in front of a large crew. We stayed in Berkeley and the 3 hour time difference of the west coast allowed Chris and I to get up sooo much earlier than our call time and walk the hills around our hotel. There's nothing better than a walk that also has the most incredible houses to gawk at the entire time. I took so many photos, we got so much inspiration. No two houses were the same.

Over the Fourth, we went to Lake Lure (a beautiful lake town near Asheville, NC) with my side of the family. It was, in short, a dream. The cousins played in the deep clear water all day, while my sisters and I sat on the private dock of the house we rented and covered every topic from our childhood secret club (YOB—boy spelled backwards), to what the next 5 years look like. When we got too hot, we'd jump in the lake for a minute and then go back to the dock to talk for another hour until our hair was dry enough to be hot again and then we'd jump in again. It was the kind of vacation where you don't look in the mirror all week. Where there's a puzzle on the dinner table. There's no bed times and no cell service and you never really want to leave. The day we ventured from our secluded Airbnb to the actual Lake Lure, it was like going back in time. What year was it? It could have been the 80s or present day. The weekend was healing and Chris and I started talking about looking into a lake house instead of a beach house. The vibes. The vibes!!! They were slower and quieter and combined our love for cabins and water. Maybe a lake house was exactly what we were looking to renovate next.

We were scheduled to be in Charleston, SC for a photoshoot with Loloi shortly after the lake and our youngest, Polly, got very sick. She has a condition called PFAPA where she gets intense fevers and sores and a terrible cough every 5 weeks or so. We've done everything to help her—removed her tonsils, adenoids, put her on a steroid treatment, but in the end, her doctor said she is one of those cases that will just have to grow out of it. I had crippling anxiety at the idea of leaving her for another week. Not going was not an option as the most incredible house was rented. The crew was there! Greta, our oldest, was at summer camp for the week and we were able to change our plans and take our two youngest with us to Charleston. We all slept together in one charming hotel room and the team set up a room at the house where we were shooting for the girls to hang out in while we were on set. I was able to check in with them every hour and by the end of the week, Polly was feeling well enough to do some exploring. It turned into such a memorable week. I realized how strengthened I was having my kids close by and it was cool for them to see a peek into what Chris and I do when we're away.

When we got home, Polly got her 3rd set of tubes in her ears, which put a damper on swimming for the next few weeks, but it helped her so much otherwise. By this point of the summer, I was completely drained from traveling, but we had a family reunion in Idaho with Chris's family that we had been counting down to. Now, when we go back to Idaho, where we moved from 3 years ago, it's a race to fit in as much as we possibly can. How many family members can we see? How many old friends can we meet up with? It's never as much as we hope for but definitely more than you think you can do in a week. We spent a night at our friends' cabin on the lake, we bunked up with Chris's parents and had an incredible reunion with his family on, quite possibly, the hottest day Idaho had ever experienced. We met up with friends for dinner. I saw my sisters that still live there. The girls were surrounded with cousins all week and when I ask them what the highlight of their whole summer was--they immediately say "Idaho!" It's a good feeling to have so much love for a place and simultaneously, be so happy with your decision to leave it. It doesn't feel like home anymore, but I'm so grateful to love so many people there so we can always come visit.

When we got home, we celebrated Polly's 7th birthday August 1 and then had one. more. work trip to San Francisco. We flew out on a Sunday and back home on Tuesday morning. It was one day of shooting and two days of traveling. And the thought of it being our last trip of the summer ignited me. I can do it one more time I kept telling myself, to pump myself up. To convince myself. The weird thing about being a homebody is you can be having a great time somewhere else, learning and growing and experiencing new beautiful things and places and people--but there's this hole in your gut that can only be filled with the familiar routine and sounds and smells of being home. And when you're gone for too long or for too often, you start feeling like a shell because that hole just keeps getting larger.

When we got home from that trip just a few weeks ago, I felt like a shell. I struggled making decisions or finding motivation. I felt like crying every day—Chris encouraged me to cry if I felt like crying. I had been away too much this summer and it was all catching up to me.

In between work trips, I got called to be the Primary President at our church. I don't talk about religion or church very often because it's something really sacred to me and I don't want to invite any negative comments or feedback on that part of my life. But this assignment catapulted a really big shift for me. The primary president is over all of the children in our church from 18 months to 11 years old, and the many wonderful teachers that help. It came at a time where I had been feeling my life was incredibly off-balance. It felt like every part of my days and my thoughts and the majority of decisions from 5 am to 9 pm revolved around work and our business. I was praying for a way to find more balance. I thought the answer would come in the form of some great idea where suddenly knew how to run my business at a slower pace or something would magically change at work where I could release my brain from the pressure I was feeling of attempting to keep it all afloat. I thought the answer was doing less. But it was actually doing more...of something different. Being asked to be in charge of the spiritual progression of 50 some adorable children on a weekly basis is...a lot. And honestly, it was an answer to prayer. It forced me to make changes at work. It forced me to set a new pace for myself and to focus on more important things. I'm still catching on. I'm still mid-shift, for sure. But we made a lot of changes at work with goals and employees and content and I can see the future so clearly now.

With the summer ending and fall beginning, I'm focusing on a slower pace. I'm careful to not fill our weekends. I'm enjoying a simple routine. I want to enjoy this season. Of the year. Of life. I want to host a bunch of fall gatherings in our home. I want to make changes to our living room. I want to wake up, in my bed, at 5 a.m. and workout. I want to walk Cricket around all of the neighboring streets. I want to have people over for dinner and watch the leaves change on the trees in our backyard. I'm excited to do school carpools and dress up for Halloween. I can't wait to simply putter around. At home. <3